Abnormal?

I don't understand why I click well and better with non-elite students and friends and understand them easier than those of elite students. Perhaps because i've been through some of the worse classes in both primary school and secondary school?  
When I was Primary 3, i was in one of the last few classes , and looked down upon. But subsequently, I guess now i'm in a not-bad state in my class (: Proves that I can be either somewhat elite and non-elite. 
Hahhhh. Feel like i'm coming back to blogging. Hais, this little .. ! tablemate of mine making me to come back. Hahaha, but i like the feeling of coming back to blogging. (: Saying things and expressing what I usually can't say infront of others or on twitter. 
Haengbokanda. (:

BYEEE ^^

Can't believe.

Can't believe what I did today. Hahahah told a guy about my small secret. Really didn't imagine that I'll tell a guy about these things which I usually only do among my girl friends :) hahah, Lev ! If you're seeing this.. If. I DELETED THE IMPORTANT POST THAT YOU WANTED TO SEE HAHAHAAA ONLY FASHA KNOWS ! YAYYY ! ^^


Good day. Bye.

Awkwardness

Heylooo ~
School's going to start soon, again. Once again, we'll all be back to our seats and listen to class... yes. The Seat. I don't know why but i'm usually awkward around boys. Hah, maybe i don't look it ? , but yes i am, struggling to even talk. Sit beside confirm cannot don't talk right, especially group discussion. Only those that have the probability of me falling for him, i'll be awkward.
The most awkward thing is.. Our school uniform.
It sucks. SUCKBIGTIME.
Not that i'm a pervert of what, but i've seen other girls' tummy or you-know-what through the gaps of the buttons . When we sit or bend, the gaps naturally opens up and at a specific angle you can see inside...
Hais, thats why i keep pulling my shirt.. BECAUSE I HAVE THE RIGHT AS A GIRL, NO , AS A HUMAN TO PROTECT MYSELF. Haishhhh.
If i sit with girls, i dont even care cause we have same things. 

Anywayyyy ~ Sitting at that seat, not that i hate it and wanna change place, but i wanna switch place, with him. Atleast it's Fasha,  it's okay. ^^
Hais, even talking is awkward. Awkward with boys > awkward with protecting myself > awkward to talk > super freaking awkward when sitting together.
zzz
Anyway.. i just woke up, and did this post. Because i dreamt of him. Hahh, perhaps it's mah brain reminding me school's reopening  so the awkwardness shall be back. 

Kumaowo. <: nbsp="nbsp">




-----------
Ohh, but no. I'm not having a crush on my pig tablemate even though i dreamt of him. Ok. byee ^^

Psst.

Hello !
Have been slacking quite a lot these few days. Watching dramas and sleeping. Throwing homework aside.
It kind of got me wondering why so many people are joining Twitter. And Fasha, yes, him. But who cares , 'cause what you said that time was right i guess. I have no feelings for him, just for that slight second of thought maybe. Haha, now , I found someone more cute and attractive than him.  Much better i guess. But also not like like him. Just the attractiveness caught my eyes. Hah, life's interesting. The feeling is good when you dont have anyone in mind, anyone you like. It frees me. haha , is there such word as "frees"..

#nowplaying Complete- Snsd

Dad just bought a new notebook for his use and my use. Sharing it since once im going polytechnic, i'll get another one. Not bad actually now that im using it, but the keyboard's so cramp and kind of not adapted to using notebook again since it has been a long time i used one.
Was shocked to see Bryankok,Mayor and idk who else at COMEX yesterday yesterday. Kind of terrified cause they look all so gangster.'\(._.)/`

Hands healing just fine ^^

Not shy to say, im really quite interested in make-up. Cosmetics and make-up, beauty products and hair-dos. Hahaa, say that im vain whatsoever. Im just really interested in them. How magical that a girl can doll up herself and look like another person, and complete different person. It's cool. How it can boost a person's self-esteem and confidence to present himself/herself to the world.
I've never really confide into anyone about my interest to make-up. Except my family knows. I do make-up on my mum when she goes for dinners, or special events, teach her about the application and crap like that. 'Cause she doesnt really know even though she says she does, and learnt them before.
For me, i learnt all of them from the internet, not only youtube but other video websites too. From professionals like Michelle Phan. I observe how she do her tutorials and learn about beauty tricks (although i never try them ). I just did a simple application of BB Cream on my sis today.
It's so much fun ! Plus, i really like dolling-up. Just that i dont want to act like im 19+ or like a woman when im only  young teen. I still want to remain like a chilish girl, and not act like a mature lady on the outside when the inside is like a 13 year old.
To be compared with others, im actually over, over mature.  Perhaps because of the family im in. :) im grateful though, for all the knowledge i learn from all these shortcomings. I've became more sensitive and considerate than who i actually should be. Reckless and wild. Haha.


Such a long post. But.. it's been a long time, so .. YUPS GOODBYE. <3 p="p">
p/s: The reed-hat guy on Chilwu the mighty on KBS WORLD , so freaking hot. omg. ^^

A post only dedicated for you.

Okay, I know like the title sounds alittle mushy and girlfriend-boyfriend kind but seriously hell no. It's for a lovely girlfriend of mine.

So yeah.
To this friend of mine,
I hope you'll know that I'll be always there for you. I mean of course i wont be able to be literally there for  you when you need me, but i'll be there in terms of mental support okay ? I know how it feels when you feel like there's no one there for you, because i've been through it. Except, boy-girl relationship cause i never had one. If it's family and money and stuff like that, tell me, just to share your worries. I might even be able to help.. maybe.. x)
Hahas, but anyways.. you still really don't know a lot about me.. mostly, my family. 
Anyways, you didnt tell me you've got a part-time job. ! Your job seems to be interesting! Makeup for it.. and play with kids probably ? Your job supposed to be a fun and happy thing, like cheering people up. Make other's life a little more happy. But infact.. you're like really emotional and sad inside. I don't like the you in your blog. You're always so happy-go-lucky when in school .. I didn't know you have a.. from what i see.. alittle not supportive family.. correct me if im wrong. Your sis. Ask her to do the stuff seriously. She has a life and YOU HAVE A LIFE TOO. Like hello ? You maid ah ?
And... I see that you want all of the knowledge in this world. No, you wont. Not everything is worth knowing. The world may become a worse place in your mind when you know it. It may change your opinion of everyone, become too cautious around everyone, afraid of the world, you may not thought about it.. change your character.. like.. WHAT IF YOU BECOME A TERRORIST ?! You'll kill me too ! Or nuclear bomb the whole world... T_T dontt...

Okay blog again next time.. my sis need to bring the com out le. hehe. BYESS. Cheerup babe. <3 font="font">

After so longg..

I'm probably back to blogging. All because of this little girl ^^ you know who you are. That'll be the only one reading this blog already , cos its dead like so freaking long. 

Recently, like the day before , I once again finally had the time to visit my favourite place, Changi Airport ! Went there to the viewing mall to shop around the gallery and i sat at the viewing gallery for a long time. Just watching the aeroplanes land , and reading a book that a friend reccomended. But hell yea, didnt manage to read much since I'm not fond of reading books. AT ALL. Hate reading. x.x

When I finally got up from the seat and begin to move on, i stopped and shopped at the "Street" designed like one, with all expensive artsy stuff there. Sooo pretty and elegant. But super expensive. Very scared that i'll knock one down. Haha. And here comes the forever-stalking-teenagers-or-non-adults staff.. DO I LOOK LIKE I WANNA STEAL? Like seriously, fuckoff . I'm happy enjoying looking at the art pieces and here you go stalking me. URGHH.

Haha, okay. THE END. ^^

Quotes learned from the artsy pieces :

If cats are able to talk, they will be purrrfect.

The more I see men, the more I admire dogs.

Recents of #imsiao

It's actually quite hard to get by, when the person you crushed on is from another class and you're not going to that class frequently. I kinda hate this feeling. It's such a faraway crush thing. No interaction whatsoever and that sucks.
I miss him so easily and so very often .
这种感觉好讨人厌。我有时会一直很想看到他但是我都每有机会去他班。。。
Best friend sits right beside him, 2by2 seating arrangement. And just nice she sit with him. I want to get many many many chance to go her class to fetch her instead, not only because I want to see him but also I don't like the feeling of being left out. Like they're always the ones coming to our class and we're forever delaying their time. I rather we take turns to go each others class and also know who are the friends they are making with.
I just hate it when only one person do their part and the rest just sits by and do nothing. I wanna fetch them from their class then to recess too.. I don't want them to always rush and come our class. Even when I insisted on fetching best friend, she just keeps insisting she'll be the one to come my class instead. I'm like not doing my part and I hate the feeling. Anyway I really want to have and get chances to see him more often as well. Can't concentrate in class.. And what I do is that I start to tell people I like him.
I'm siao. Yes , it's #yousiao ? On twitter. Kns. Can tweet about him also, got his classmates following me. Also I don't dare to add him on Facebook . Zzz. I cowarddddd! But I hope eventually we will become friends. :)
And yes, I HOPE FOR CHINESE PROJECTS AND TEACHER GROUPS US TOGETHER bwahahahahah ! Me evil evil !
Okay can, type so long le haha, but didn't use much time . Kay, goodbyeee ^^
<3

P/s: Urgh so jealous of gf get to sit with him ! But his class so many flirt plus chiobu confirm me no chance de hahaha LOL. Kay whatever what am I talking kns. Change class with gf ! Take her seat muhahahahaha , just joking .. :( will never happen . Only hope : Chinese lessons ^^

No one's gonna visit my blog so, all the crap can all come out now ~

 Here it goes .

You don't have to bang everything back onto the shelf to show that you're angry. I drank the medicine. I didn't have too much or too little sleep. I just merely forgotten how to draw the prescribed lines on the bottle. I didn't want to run away so quickly, it was because mummy everytime she only ask me to draw lines, not to help with the tablets. Even when she does, she tells me exactly what to do before hand and guide me along even though i've been helping out for so long. You didn't tell me what i am needed for or guide me. You just simply expected that i know everything, have super good memory, able to remember so many things that you said, this with this, and that , then this with that and that for this, and i should know how to do it like a pro.

I didn't know what to do after breakfast and all i wanted to do was to sleep for a short while more then start homework since i wasted yesterday. But in the middle of my morning sleep, you coughed so badly, i had to wake up to check on you. I was concerned. But then i got giddy when i stand up too fast, i always do and you never did anything to help.You scolded me for something i hadn't realise and something that i am not sure about. You started scolding me so badly and banging everything while making medicine for me, and poured all the past times out and scolded so badly. You even used vulgars, but for that, im used to it already. 

Friends used to not believe what i say about home, primary school friends, secondary , all. Because what you are doing to the family is unbelievable. They wouldn't believe i got dragged and carried up by the neck like an animal when i was 4. Getting caned when i was primary 1. Not getting money when i go out since primary 5. Now, i'm broke and the only people who really care is mummy and sis. You don't give a fuck. I'm always so terrified to be alone at home. Because i don't know when you will come home, and act up again.
 Your stare and glariiings just now just told me you wanted to bash me up. But right, you back everyone up when they irritate you or didnt even do a single fucking thing to harm or by accident did something so small, but angered you. You could have the power to just make everything so bigcase. It's a small matter, why take it to heart ? Why do you always blame something on us when its not our fault ? Whatever you do wrong, is our fault. Something we did extremely right and happy, is your credit. Whatthefuck is that logic ? 

Come to think of it, if i'd stop using the computer, you would have gone to those pages again. It's like so open. I snatch away, you wanna bash me up again.

I'm sorry i post this but i really can't take it anymore., any further. I had enough. I've always been strong, showed that i'm strong, even when im not, make time for others and not myself. Help cheer other people up. But what about myself ? No one cheers me up. Never, i can promise you, even if they did, it's only a few. like twice or 3 times in my life ? For exams matters or something. Not personal stuffs. I can't stay so strong forever. I'm not made of steel, no feelings, hard and stable. Nowadays, i don't know what had gotten into me that i always feel so lonely and down. Simply put it this way, I'm no longer strong and is about to collapse anywhere. I just cried.

Fml.

Just fuckmylife.
Google just made my excess to blogger limited, just because i didnt have my email verification done .
Why make it so complicated ? I've been using blogger since 2007 , then it changed to be part of Google.
It was fine , everything was as per normal until everything became so complicated, upgrading and shit , what for ? Simplicity is the best .
Now, i have limited excess to blogger, which made me unable to blog for the past month which i have a lot of time for blogging.
So, this short post will be just informing that i wont be blogging , maybe for a period of time, maybe forever in this account.
Super, duper, fustrated with Google ! :/
But, in anyway , if i'm continuing my blogging life , it will still be this site. Since, 2007, i've been blogging in this account and all my blogged ups and downs are here, and i dont want to leave this place.
If i had to continue blogging but unable to blog here le, then i'll be using Wordpress, or something else like Livejournal . Hope not ! All my past(s) are stuck here with fucking Blogger(Google) .
Hmph !! >:/

P/S: Stop upgrading and shitass things like that , dearest Blogger,Google ! Thanks a lot ! -.-

GuZheng Ensemble FUN-NESS.

Today, is the perfect day ! IT'S THE SYF DAY !

We, guzheng ensemble, went for SYF competition today !

Our results are out and *dengdengdengdeng!*

WE GOT SILVER. AWESOME !

After school, we gathered at canteen to wait together for the results at 5pm!

Got one ex-crestian gz senior came back to join us too !

She's like so friendly ! . Then we played something really vigorous .. WATER BOMB !

We all like so excited and cos the concrete floor , i almost fell ! No one helped me lorr . Sadness.

and anyw, we had total fun. I bomb like dont know how many people and poured water all over KokXin and Eunice ! HAHAHAHA. They poor thing la. ^^ 2 of my favourite seniors ! !

Hahahaha , KokXin like dont wan dont wan, then i just go up to her , say hi and just poured the water. She like at first sad sad , then everyone like so shocked and was like angry angry . Then stare stare. But then after that, she ok le, then keep laughing LOL. hahahahahahahaha ^^

Then when ex-crestian senior water fight with Eunice inside toilet, I just faster pour water on eunice . HAHAH. like bathing her seyy . FUN-NESS. We all one group of girls of 25++ people at parade square scream and shout like crap ! SO FUN.

I WANT ONCE MORE PLEASE ! ^^

HMPH.

IM BORED.

Sad.

This blog is no longer a place that i can confide everything into already.

Sadded. :(

BLOGGER FOR 4 YEARS AND COUNTING.

Hahaha , hello !

I've been blogging for like what, going 5 years ?

Dont blog a lot but still, you know. Kept it alive.

HHAA , it's so funny.

The year that i've blogged the most was when i was P5 , the year that i dont really have friends ?

Aha , got it ? BLOG FIGHT la, easy.

haha, shh. dont talk about it le ^^

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Doing homework now,.. i mean almost doing but not quite.

Facebook-ing and blogrolling ^^

Hmm , im confused . Confused yet dont know who to ask advice on .

Hais diao. K la k la, im off from here !

* CAMP WAS FUN.

Blog about it next time :)

x3

Homework all day long ~

Everyday had been the same.

Homework homework homework till late night.

Yesterday, I only started doing my homework at like 11 pm ? I ended so late at 4.30am .

Surprisingly, Nani just woke up and she smsed me if im still awake.

Hahaha, i should have replied" Nope, i'm not awake. "

Funnyy eh.

Nani asked if i could borrow her my paint so that she can do her art work and not get scolded.

I agreed and she came over to my house( we're neighbours) .

So early in the morning at 4.30am know ! She's damn scared outside my house alone. Hahaha!

First time do this kind of thing. So scared if i open the door is bad people so, i checked through the door eye thing first.

Better safe then sorry right !

Soso, lend her le , i went back to pack things up for school 2hours later. LOL

Then then go sleep le lorhs :D

See, so guai go do homework despite being tired until 4.30 am IN THE MORNING know !

Who the fuck so stupid will go and do this !

ME LAH :D

Then then , this morning , erm i mean yesterday morning , have chinese test.

I slept during test sia , fuck la.

But obviously i finish the paper then sleep :B

Got alot questions dont know how to do but , heeeck !

Sleep more impt !

when passing up paper, my teacher was like looking at me and laughing cos you know what?

My eyes were half closed and blinking like crazy to keep open when i looked at her.

Then she said " Aiyo , you how come liddat ..? "

Then i just blatantly looked at her and smile, and dozed off. LOL

I dont think i cant hold on any longer if i continue liddat le, my eyes got so hot this morning, i mean last morning that i almost cried.

Wtf, sians.

I HATE HOMEWORK!!!

BIOLOGY is plainly , FUN.

Did some starch test yesterday and i was so amazed and roaring over how cool it looked.

The leaf turned light brown when boiled and in alcohol?

The alcohol turned green because of the chlorophyll being diffused ! AHHAHA.

IMMA SO SMART * ahem* :P

OKOK , soso i chionging homework still so.., nights to you people ! ^^

Byebyes ! :D

Hellohellohello :D

Hello hello peeps :D

Long time no seee =)

Just turned a year older 2 days ago ! damn happy shit . :P

Jie mei mens wanted to celebrate for me on Thursday but in the end didnt..,

'cos BelBel fell ill and Yingy didnt make it so Isabelle said cancel .

Sians.. haiis , 2nd year liddat le. =(

no outing toos , or gathering , aiya same same .

So went home on Thursday to eat lunch and sleep sleep sleep .

FRIDAY ! MY SPECIAL DAY ARRIVES :D

Went to school with Nani at about 8.40am .

she actually forgotten about my birthday then when i reminded her angrily , she started blaming her phone .

She took out her phone and check then pointing at it scolding it like " walao ! serious ah ! WHY NO ALARMMMM !! AHH " LOL , epic ! :D

then she wished me happy birthday ^^

After reaching school, Amirah came to say Happy birthday too , then more and more girls came to say also since the word spreaded and i got loads of hugs in school :D

My first ever birthday that friends gives hugs to me on birthday :B

damn happy . ^^

Then some guys came to wish me too !

Thankyou peeps from 2/4 ! (@)<--

On facebook, loads of peeps said happy birthday to me too :D haha shiok max.

First to wish me was..* drum roll *

MATTHIAS :D MUAHAHAHAHA

OK, next . At night didnt have any celebration with family too but had a fun time watching TV ^^

OKOK , enough alr . neeeda do homework. shitszxc.

Byebye lovelies :D

EARLY HAPPY LUNAR NEW YEAR CHINESE FRIENDS !! x3

2011 is here !

HAPPY NEW YEAR ! :D

Wish everyone a happy year ahead !

Hope everyone will excel in your studies and everything that you do !

Happy new year ! HAPPY HAPPY !

- Lampy x3

Sian lah.

Everyday's been homework homework .

Non-stop . Tuition homework also havent finish , failure.

Literature project has been a trouble to me ! so fustrating that i cant get the explanations !

Eww !!!

Hate literature, verrrk.

Dad's been nagging and fustrating us again.

- OK STOP. NAGGED BY MUM-

BYEBYES.

-knnbehccb ! -

Belated Merry Christmas ! :D

Merry Christmas ! (belated =x)

Abandoned this place like dont know how long , hahs.

BUT ANYWAY , HAPPY BOXING DAY !

Really dont know why they call it boxing day . so weird !

Andd , I'VE GOT PRESENTS !

Mummy and Dad got me a small bag , AND ITS FREAKING PINK ! :D

Looks classy . Let me enhance the word " LOOKS " .

Haha , and I got myself a present cos i didnt know myy parents will buy and so to comfort myself , i got myself a handphone cover ! And obviously in pink ! (L)

Soo happy.

Hope you peeps had a wonderful boxing day ! :D

Hey, get this right.

Excuse me,

im not the first one who accused you but the first time i accused you isnt it?

how many times do you want to compare with how many times you accused me ?

everytime when he accuse you you also dont dare to fan kang right.

or else is you ownself fault then blames others first then seeing that you have no other roar to take then you admit its you who done it.

how would i know its not you this time?! you're always the own being like this.

you keep saying that i fight witth you, hey please..

YOU'RE THE ONE THAT FOUGHT WITH ME. I alr say nvm alr, you continue. continue and continue.

just because you're my elder that doesnt mean i can say anything.

i fan kang, you say i bully you, then you fan kang, can i say you bully me too?

excuse me, why are you acting all like these again ?!

I SAY ITS MY FAULT, I ACCUSED YOU, SORRY.

YOU SAY I SAID IT COS IM SARCASTIC.

THEN, okay lah?! not my fault lor !

=.=

stop being so wu zhi like how he say you were. i want to help you, ending up getting myself into trouble, slapping myself for 20 times because i wanted to protect you.

WHY AM I SO STUPID.

Wae friendship?

Why are things always going like this ?

Why can't things be the way we wanted?

I guess , we can't have an answer for this isnt it ?

Let me just use some letters for i want to protect my friend.

A - my friend

B - my friend's bestfriend

C - B's bestfriend.

D - Hates B .

One fine day,..

* RINGGGGG ! RINGGG ! * (recess)

A and i was all excited for recess and went for the canteen .

C saw me and asked

"later we sit with you all can?"

"ofcos ! sureee ! :D "

then while buying food with A ,

A said

" ltr B come and sit with us kays? :D"

" okay !, but just now C come and tell me le. "

" oh really, dkdk luhs "

and when we got back at our sit, B came and sit with us.

started talking to A about C and D.

I was like " HUH? "

after knowing all, they had a fight.

C came along with D and saw B.

B and company moved in a little so that C and D can sit tgt.

C &D walked away.

I was so confused. idk why it happened.

but anyway,.. main part.

2nd day:

A came to find me while i was buying drinks for lunch cos its cca after that.

she asked me to go to the toilet to find her, she had something to tell me.

After putting my drinks down, i went to find her.

She came out of the cubicle with red eyes.

I asked her what happened? what did you want to tell me?

She said

" D and C just now tell me.. that (sobs and tears forming ) B hates me. (tears fell) idk if its true anot .. (cries.) They said that B didnt care if i waited for her for a very long time, as she hates me from primary school. they said that B say the f word somemore ! idk what to do ... (continues to cry.)"

I gave a hug and told her not to worry. I let her go to the more privacy part of the toilet and the changing rooms there.

There, she cried infront of me, telling me that how she had trusted B and their friendships.

I was tearing too, worried.

I didnt want anything or either expected anything like this to happen again, not on my bestfriend. There she was, tearing infront of me yet i cant do anything for her. Im not good at comforting either. but giving suggestons and alittle of comfortinng that i know to her was what i could atleast do.

When we were talking, C and D came in and we heard their voices.

I quickly went up to atleast give a little more time for A to calm down and wipe her tears.

She kept telling me not to tell anyone.

C & D dispite me blocking them, went up to confront A, telling her not to friend B anymore since she hated her since pri sch. just acting that she friends A cos of her standards and all that.

I was there trying to sneak away with A cos i know, its a bad feeling for a person to be hearing the bad stuffs of her own bestfriend said about her. cos i went through all this before.

ITS JUST SAD ENOUGH TO SEE YOUR BEST FRIEND GETTING ALL SAD AND DISAPPOINTED.

WHY MUST PEOPLE DO THIS TO EACH OTHER, HURTING EACH OTHER. I CANT STAND IT . WE ARE ALL FRIENDS, CANT WE JUST TOLERATE SOMETIMES, HAVE SOME PRIDE AND DONT BREAK PEOPLE'S BEST FRIENDSHIPS OR WANTED FRIENDSHIPS RIGHT INFRONT OF THEM BECAUSE YOU AND OTHER PARTY FOUGHT? WHYYYYYYYYYY. WHY . WHY .WHY. YOU PEOPLE ARE JUST PEEPS WITHOUT A HEART, A THOUGHT FOR OTHERS.

now, B,C,D all got back tgt. and so, kicking A aside?

wae, wae friendships ? WAE.